By Theophilus Keme
“Why does Uncle Eniye always act like he knows everything? It is almost like I can not have my ways with him.
He always claim to have once being my age to know all my tricks to getting things from him”
“Abeg!”
“Uncle Eniye is a very stingy man! In short I don’t even like him like that sef, except for the few times he gives me money to buy speedy and coaster biscuits.
“And this type of kind gesture is rare oo!!”
“Perhaps he only get us things on few occasions when papa puts on the big generator and Uncle Eniye comes by the house to plug his fine blue Samsung phone.
“But on normal days he doesn’t give us shi shi.”
“I’m sure the reason why he even gives me money or buy me speedy biscuits is so my sister; Biboere, and I wouldn’t use his fine phone to play snake and bounce game”
“Well! Whatsoever, he still remains a wicked and stingy Uncle!”
“I won’t even greet him much again, because I know I will someday grow big as him and I will be a better uncle to my brothers and sisters.
“I will give them my phone to play plenty games as they want”
“I will not be asking small children plenty of questions, like the way Uncle Eniye does!
“If they come to me that they need something. I will just give them money and not be like Uncle Eniye who ask too many questions whenever we meet him for something. He doesn’t give small children Shi Shi!”
“Gbarenn (stingy) Uncle!”
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These were the thoughts I my siblings and other children in the compound were keen to have about our big Uncles and big Auntys whilst we were kids.
As a matter of fact the perception was virtually drawn onto any older person who somehow had a defensive mechanism to not playing to our bid.
The naivety as kids made us not to know that life can be double sided, where some days feels like Christmas with a lot to enjoy and share, and other days that Sepa will hold Uncle/Aunty on their neck not to be able to cough out shi shi for ordinary request of “Uncle buy biscuits for me”
Now that I also, have grown, to be an adult and I am addressed Uncle and Brother by the kids from the neighborhood and others, I deeply see the reason why Uncle Eniye had behaved the way he did towards us! (Cost of living choke uncle)
I think I and my sister may need to find Uncle and the other older people we had mocked as kids, and render a warmth apology to him (them), because I think am currently behaving more careful if not worse than Uncle Eniye in my neighborhood!
That was how I had returned from work one faithful day and the children in my compound was shouting “Uncle welcome uncle welcome” one even offered to carry my bag, and there was another who sat on his own minding his business, until his attention was called by his friend, “won’t you come and welcome uncle?”
And to my amazement, the young boy didn’t even conceal his perception about me, “Uncle is too wicked abeg ”, he just expressed himself openly without any form of regards that I was right in front of him.
Witnessing that really got me laughing as I can’t deny that I don’t know what he is talking about, (even me don do am to somebody before, this must be karma) I just jokingly teased him “junior! it is me oo! your correct uncle that you are calling wicked?”
He didn’t even lift his head up to indulge what I was saying. Although earlier in the month I realized I was quite cruel to him because of food. (You won’t blame me, Country get as e take be)
Have you wanted to eat something but just couldn’t get yourself to spend money on that ? That was my fate the day I returned from work with pepper grilled turkey and other chops.
I usually passed the barbecue joint on my way back from work. It smelt so good, but I didn’t want to buy it mid-month. I patiently waited till the end of the month.
I received my salary that morning as I stepped out of the house, I was happy and fortunately I saw one of the guys who own a stand at the junction was out to clean his shop, and I told him precisely what I wanted and how he should garnish and package my turkey and other chops for me that evening, or else the whole Asaba would hear our voice.
On my way home, I picked up the pepper grilled turkey and chops with apples. In my head, “I go pull shirt deal with this turkey today” I didn’t even return anybody’s greeting, even junior wanted to come embrace me but I quickly snapped at him, before he will ask what I was carrying and ask for one. (That really got him upset, I believe)
So I totally don’t blame junior that he now thinks of me that way. That was what I had also thought of Uncle Eniye also, but I now totally understand why uncle was behaving the way he did when we were kids.
Junior wouldn’t understand sha, but las las these adulthood go reach everybody, on God!
FYI. I will try & make up to Junior with a gift. For whatsoever reason I refuse that children from the neighborhood will have such negative narrative about me “that brother wey no dey give shi shi”.
Nigeria economy is somehow, but I will do my best to be a good uncle/brother to the kids in the community.
